The Law of Resonance

I’ve met a fair whack of my lovers and friends on the dance floor!

There’s something about dancing that cuts through all the bullshit. Words don’t matter so much. Credentials don’t matter. What you do for work, how clever you are, what you own, how well you can sell yourself… none of it really counts.

It’s energy. Heart. Movement. Openness. Connection.

And yeah… resonance.

I reckon the dance floor is one of the quickest places to discover who you naturally resonate with. You feel it before you understand it. Something in you goes, Ohhh, hello. There you are.

That’s resonance.

The Law of Resonance is the idea that we don’t simply attract what we want. We tend to meet, notice and connect with what we are in energetic relationship with.

You can say all the right things. Write the vision board. Repeat the affirmations. Tell everyone you’re ready for great love, abundance, friendship, opportunity and joy.

But you can’t really fake resonance.

The universe seems to listen to vibration more than words. Although, of course, the words count too.

It’s why two people can walk into exactly the same room and have completely different encounters. One sees rejection everywhere. Another finds connection. One is armoured and waiting to be disappointed. Another is open, curious and available to surprise.

Same room. Different tune.

Life has a funny way of mirroring back the music we’re playing.

And I don’t mean this in that slightly irritating spiritual way where we blame ourselves for every shitty thing that happens. Life happens. Grief happens. Bad luck happens. Other people have free will and sometimes behave like absolute dickheads.

Resonance isn’t about controlling everything around us.

For me, it’s much more interesting than that.

It’s about noticing what I’m broadcasting, what I’m available for, what I’m repeatedly drawn towards and what keeps finding its way back to me.

Sometimes I’m beautifully in tune.

Sometimes I’m absolutely not.

I certainly know when I’ve lost my way a little. I can feel when I’m pushing too hard, performing, chasing, gripping, comparing, trying to make something happen that simply doesn’t want to happen.

And usually, the world starts mirroring that back pretty quickly.

That’s when self-reflection and awareness become bloody useful.

What am I putting out at the moment?

What am I available for?

What am I tolerating?

What keeps showing up?

Do I actually like the music I’m making?

Because if we don’t like what keeps appearing around us, perhaps there’s an invitation to gently fiddle with the dial within.

Not because we’re wrong.

Not because we need to become shinier, more spiritual or more “high vibe.”

But because we’re allowed to change the music.

We can soften. Get clearer. Tell the truth. Raise a boundary. Drop an old story. Become more playful. Stop chasing. Open our hearts again. Leave the bloody house. Go dancing!

And slowly, sometimes almost imperceptibly, the dance around us begins to change too.

I love the idea that resonance is less about desperately attracting things towards us and more about becoming deeply congruent with what we want to experience.

If I want tenderness, can I practise tenderness?

If I want honest relationships, am I being honest?

If I want wildly alive people around me, where am I wildly alive?

If I want love, how available am I to actually receive it?

There’s something deliciously empowering about that.

We don’t have to force the whole universe into position.

We just keep refining the way we groove and move through the world. Freeing ourselves up. Listening. Adjusting. Becoming more attuned to the kind of energy, love, people and experiences we genuinely want to meet.

And perhaps the best bit is that when the resonance is right, there’s often far less effort involved.

You recognise it.

A friendship. A lover. A collaborator. A place. An idea. A room full of strangers.

Something just hums.

You know when you know.

And maybe that’s why I’ll always love a dance floor.

Before anybody has had the chance to explain who they are, something much older and wiser has already started the conversation.

The body knows.

The heart knows.

The energy knows.

And then, if we’re lucky, the music gets really bloody good.

About Lucinda

Lucinda Light is a speaker, author, celebrant and professional human-noticer, curious about what makes us tick, connect, love and come alive.

Best known for Married at First Sight Australia and her book Shine Your Light, she explores relationships, self-love, communication and the gloriously messy business of being human.

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